Dirty Bingo and the Super Bowl

February 8, 2010 at 3:44 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , )

Sounds like a band name, doesn’t it?  Before I go into a dirty bingo update – GEAUX SAINTS!  I actually watched a portion of the game last night and I saw the ending in all of its glory.  I laughed out loud when Tracy Porter scored the touchdown with three minutes left, because it was just such a great play to see.  And remember, this is coming from someone who doesn’t especially like or even understand football –  though I did get the significance of that touchdown.  I know all of the Colts fans are in a depression today but I was glad to see the game go the way it did.  My only regret is that I wasn’t able to catch any of the Puppy Bowl this year.  Seriously.

Now that I’ve given credit to the Saints where their credit is due, let me go back in time, long long ago, to last Thursday night. If you recall, Thursday was Dirty Bingo Night at Victory Liquors.  As the instructions we got said, this ain’t your grandma’s bingo.  If you’ve ever played the regular kind you know that the purpose is to form various shapes on your bingo card, much like the ones seen here to the right.  Dirty bingo uses the same principle but the shapes you form are…well, dirtier.  They looked like various parts of the body, among other things.  I will let you exercise your imagination here.

The woman who was calling the numbers during bingo cussed like a sailor, though a sailor could’ve done it with more enthusiasm.  She wasn’t horrible though and she held a certain power with her paddle.  That’s right, if you didn’t follow her rules, you were hauled up on stage for a whipping in front of the whole bar.  Since my group and I managed to have a table on the stage to begin with, we had prime viewing for this.  This also means my group had prime viewing when I was called up for my birthday spankings.  Try not to let your imagination go too crazy with that one.  Even the prizes for this bingo were dirty and they definitely elicited a blush or two from their lucky recipients.  Yup, the night was full of good, dirty fun and that’s all I’m going to say about that.

All in all, my birthday was a success.  I was even able to sleep as late as I wanted the next day and it’s always a fantastic feeling to wake up and know that everyone is at the office, working away without me.  After my late rising, I took a walk and discovered a new breakfast diner close to my apartment, so it was like my birthday all over again.  I LOVE breakfast food and as of today I have found five suitable breakfast dining establishments all within walking distance of my apartment (six if you include Dunkin Donuts).  This new place is called The Alps and it’s cheap and delicious.  Even the coffee was good.  Actually, it’s not really new – apparently it was around for years before the owner retired and a bank or some such thing moved in.  It didn’t take long before the bank or whatever it was to flounder, and the owner came out of retirement to re-open the restuaraunt.  I sure am glad he did, because this is yet another place I will frequent late on weekend mornings.

After my breakfast I walked to the library to utilize their free internet.  On the way, I almost got plowed down by a giant SUV.  I have not had many scary road incidents since moving to the city but this one did get my attention.  It was spitting snow and ice and so I had my head bowed slightly as I crossed the street (in the crosswalk, with the right of way thank you very much).  I happened to glance up in just enough time to see this monster vehicle bearing down on me.  I let a choice few words slip out as I rushed out of the way to safety.  That’ll teach me to trust Chicago drivers.  On a different note, I did appreciate the other drivers who honked at the SUV in what I can only assume was anger at viewing my near death experience.  It was nice to know (or pretend) that they cared.

My last adventure for the afternoon involved me heading to this place, the Music Box Theatre.  It was built in 1929 and still has quaint little showing rooms.  I went for an afternoon showing of The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus and I must say, I was impressed.  The cozy feel of the theatre was enhanced by the fact that there were only six of us in the entire place.  The movie itself was also pretty good, in my humble opinion.  It was very visually stimulating and the whole concept was kind of out there, which I liked.  It was the film Heath Ledger was making when he died, so a few other actors stepped in to fill out his role.  They did it in such a way that it didn’t lose momentum and I thought it all worked together quite nicely.  It was one of those movies that you leave thinking that you need to see it again a few time to full appreciate it, and see it again I shall.  At some point.  It was bittersweet to see Heath’s last performance but I do think it was a good one.

As if my day wasn’t busy enough, I met up with a new friend for drinks Saturday night.  Well, I met up with her eventually.  She was about an hour late, which of course I really appreciated.  It seems to have been beyond her control but sitting at a crowded bar for an hour and hogging a perfectly good table all by my lonesome was a great way to elicit eyerolls from other patrons and a shitty attitude from my waitress.  Needless to say, my patience wore thin by the end of the night.  We had a nice time when she finally did show up though, so I guess that’s what matters.  Another lesson learned – not everyone is as punctual as I myself try to be.  Oh well, she paid for the tab and I shouldn’t ever complain about free drinks, right?

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Apparently it’s Football Season?

January 25, 2010 at 2:33 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

I will admit, I’m not a huge sports fan.  I like to play them more than anything else though there are a few I’ll sit down and watch.  I get into basketball and volleyball, don’t mind baseball and can feign interest in everything from soccer to bowling.  Football, however, is something I’ve never been able to understand.  Perhaps I would like it more if I actually took the time to learn the ins and outs of the game, but to me it’s just a bunch of big, burly guys pushing each other down, waving flags and wearing tights.  Seriously, tights?  I think the game is stopped entirely too often and I don’t understand what’s exciting about watching that pigskin advance down the field, three feet at a time.  I don’t mean to offend and I know that many of you out there are twitching in your seat and rolling your eyes as I’m bashing your favorite Sunday pastime.  Suck it up, I’m not finished yet.  FOUR HOURS per game?  What is that?!  Here is a brief list of more entertaining things I could do in four hours:

drive most of the way to my mom’s house

build an enormous fort using every pillow I own, tear it down, build it again, tear it down…etc.

make four pies from scratch

get knocked up (if I were a guy I could probably impregnate at least five separate women in this time)

paint my bathroom

fly to California

get my tubes tied

walk from my apartment to Lake Michigan and back

work an entire half day

beat Super Mario Brothers 3 (okay, this might take me a bit longer than four hours…it’s been a while)

There are many more things I could add to this list but you get the idea.

I don’t mean to sound so cynical.  It seems everyone I know is into football and this season is certainly no exception.  I’ve had to live with it for as long as I can remember and it’s especially awesome since my birthday usually falls around the Super Bowl.  Remember when the Colts played the Bears for the championship?  Yup, that was literally ON my birthday and I was kindly informed by all of my friends that unless I held a Super Bowl Party, I would be sitting solo all day long.  I acquiesced and we ended up having a party where the game played on an entire wall (thanks to an ill-gotten projector).  Personally, I thought the Puppy Bowl was more exciting but I was nice and let everyone else watch the game.  I cheered for the Colts because I lived in Indiana, but in all honestly I didn’t really care who won.  I was there for the beer and the birthday cake.  And because I lived there.

This year is proving to be slightly different, if for no other reason than genetics.

In case you’ve been living under a rock the last twenty four hours and/or do not have access to the Facebook livefeed, it’s going to be a Colts vs. Saints Super Bowl this year.  Obviously many, many people I know are wetting themselves due to the Colts being in the big game once again and I know most of my family is no exception.  Most of my northern family, that is.  My southern family members are also wetting themselves but it’s in anticipation of the Saints going to the Bowl.  I was having my weekly ten minute phone conversation with my father last night and this was all he could talk about.  He said that the state of the French Quarter right now makes Mardi Gras look tame and though I don’t believe too much that comes out of his mouth, I believe that.  In honor of my southern roots I tried to catch the tail end of the Saints game last night.  I flipped back and forth between the game and an episode of The Simpsons I had on DVD (I attempted to just stick to football, but I couldn’t do it).  I saw the game go into OT and then flipped back in enough time to see the winning kick (field goal?  Am I using that phrase properly?) and the Saints win it.  I have to admit, it made me smile because thanks to my father I know how many years the Saints have sucked and I always like a good underdog story.

And now I find my non-enthused self torn in a half-assed way.  I’ll probably at least be in the vicinity of the Super Bowl game while it’s playing so I feel like I should prepare myself to root for one team or another.  Which team shall it be?  The Colts, who hail from my home state and whom the majority of my friends and family will be cheering for?  Or the Saints, who are also of my roots and have never even seen the Super Bowl?

Underdogs it is.  Geaux Saints!

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