Whirlwind Weeks

October 25, 2016 at 2:58 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , )

It is now 11 days until I get married. IT IS NOW 11 DAYS UNTIL I GET MARRIED! Holy crap!

And really, I think most everything is finished and ready to go! Final payments have mostly been made, confirmations are set and the sorry little shell of a man who almost messed with my hotel bookings will burn in hell for eternity. All is good to go!

On top of this whole wedding-planning business, I’ve also been running a few weekend volunteer events for my office, hosting various friends and family members for entire


My life.

weekends, training for the new Tattoo exhibit at The Field Museum, attending fancy parties also at The Field Museum, volunteering at the food pantry, watching actor Bryan Cranston give a talk about celebrity, acting and life in general, watching in disgust at the debates and current state of American politics, attending two book clubs, cheering for the Cubs as the go to the WORLD FREAKING SERIES and trying to get bits of sleep when I can. Oh and that list is just from the past few weeks. In fact, this coming weekend is the first one I don’t have booked completely solid since September 3rd. So I’m going to take it easy, wrap up some wedding stuff and hopefully catch up on some sleep because oh yeah, next weekend I’m getting married!

I’d like to write individual posts for many of the events I mentioned above and maybe one day I’ll get around to it. Suffice to say, most everything I’ve been doing is good and/or fun so I don’t have too many complaints, other than I do this to myself. What’s up with that? Oh well, as my momma always says, “I can sleep when I’m dead”


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SpaceWhales Wedding Recap

June 1, 2016 at 3:10 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

So I’m surviving Pilates and have lived to tell another tale!

The tale I tell today is that of one of my oldest and dearest friends and her recent wedding. Sarah and I met in the dorms in college and lived together in a pretty sweet house for a couple of years in that time between dorm-living and just-graduated-from-college-living. She moved to Chicago a little before I did and we’ve been able to reconnect up here, which has just made this city all the better. Sarah and I have been there for each other through tests, finals, toga parties, dance parties, relationships making up and breaking up, the birth and death of beloved pets, various family drama and the general navigation of college and emerging adulthood. She was an English major like I was and we bonded over great literature (especially Stephen King and Valley of the Dolls) as well as great television (Desperate Housewives and Boston Legal, I’m looking at you). We’ve been friends through Elizabeth Taylor tattoos, extreme Photoshopping and drunken nights of falling over air conditioning units and I am so, so thankful that she’s still a part of my life. I’ve watched her go from someone who only ingested candy, whiskey and cigarettes and once puked after a bike ride to class to someone who works out regularly and makes delicious vegan meals while painting something for an upcoming art show. In short, Sarah is someone I’ve always looked up to (figuratively and literally) and she’s just plain awesome.

And so is her wife, Betsy! These two women have so much in common and seem to compliment each other perfectly. They’re funny, creative, intelligent and supremely inspiring human beings who are an absolute riot to be around. They told me about their upcoming nuptials on Record Store Day, after we had all made some amazing purchases and were enjoying some fantastic vegetarian food. Even their casual announcement to keep an eye out for an email about the wedding they were having in two weeks was just about perfect! And Scott and I were delighted to attend.


Sarah to the right, Betsy to the left. Khaleesi in the middle.

The theme was SpaceWhales, since Betsy loves Space and Sarah loves Whales. I was lucky enough to meet Sarah for brunch before showtime and she even wore the blue scarf I brought along (it was something of mine she used to dress up with in college and covered the whole something old/something borrowed/something blue thing). The ceremony began with one of their friends leading the entire Thai restaurant full of people in a sing-along of the theme song to Golden Girls, of which roughly 97% of those in attendance knew word for word (yours truly included, obviously). This was the long version too, FYI. The ceremony went on to continue a reading from a passage of Moby Dick and a tribute to everyone from Liza Minnelli to Dame Elizabeth Taylor. Then Sarah spoke her vows, which she completely and appropriately made up on the spot. Same for Betsy, and both sets of vows brought tears to everyone’s eyes.

Then there was cake! Delicious, delicious cake. And Thai food, pictures in front of Wrigley Field and tons of toasting. Also a huge hat with many planets flowing around. And more delicious cake!

It was by far the most unique wedding I’ve ever been lucky to be a part of. Scott’s a little jealous that ours won’t be as laid-back but their wedding did get both of us excited to stand in front of our loved ones and exchange vows of our own. Of course, our wedding probably won’t have anything Moby Dick related but it will still be awesome. Especially if I can get everyone to sing along to the Golden Girls theme song with me.

Anyway. Congrats to two of my favorite women and may you both have a lifetime of love, happiness and SpaceWhales!

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I’m Gettin’ Hitched!

January 26, 2015 at 8:53 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , )

That’s right, Scott and I are engaged!

He got me good, guys. We’ve been talking about engagement and marriage for a while now and while I knew this was coming, he still managed to pull off a surprise. I had worked a full day and then went to the gym, so by the time I got home I was tired and kind of smelly. When I walked in our apartment, I was surprised to see that it was spotless from top to bottom. That alone thrilled me and Scott said he wanted us both to have a nice, laid-back evening so he had gotten our chores out of the way. I hopped in the shower and when I got out he called me to the kitchen, saying he had some chocolate covered strawberries in there for us. I walked in and he turned off the lights, because he had candles and a gorgeous floral arrangement of sunflowers and roses that he had put together himself. At this point I got tears in my eyes and started shaking a bit. He took me by the shoulders and gave a wonderfully sweet speech about how much he loved me, our little family with the Dude and our home together and that he wanted to continue loving me for the rest of his life. By this time, we were both crying just a bit. Then he got on one knee and said he didn’t have a ring yet – then he started laughing and pulled it out of his pocket, that funny guy. I basically said of course I’ll marry you and then we collapsed into a heap of giggles, tears and mushy love. (All together now – aww!).

We have a small dry erase board in our kitchen for general notes and tomfoolery. I noticed this was written there about 2 hours after Scott proposed!

We have a small dry erase board in our kitchen for general notes and tomfoolery. I noticed this was written there about 2 hours after Scott proposed!

He had called all of our parents and siblings beforehand to let them know what was going to happen so my family was anxiously awaiting my call to confirm. Everyone was thrilled and even my dad sounded choked up. We spent the rest of the evening gushing with our loved ones and enjoying some delicious carryout Mexican (since we were way too distracted to bother with a silly thing like cooking). On that note – there were no chocolate covered strawberries (I couldn’t help but ask about them later). He apologized that the store was out of them but said he needed something a little special to get me into the kitchen. I’ll survive without but may pick some up tonight just because I can!

Anyway, isn’t my ring super beautiful? It’s a moissanite, which is a gem entirely different from a diamond and made up of the same elements that have been found on meteors. It’s made by science, super gorgeous not nearly as pricey as diamonds. I think everyone deserves whatever type of ring they want for an engagement but I personally have some problems with the whole diamond industry and didn’t want one for myself. So this is perfect!

On Saturday, Scott and I went to a super fancy restaurant that one of my bosses had given me a gift card for at Christmas so we got to enjoy an amazing meal that was definitely celebratory. I was able to introduce him as my fiancé (which is still taking some getting used to) and we’re both still kind of riding this engagement high. No plans have been made yet and to be honest I want to take at least a few weeks or a month to just enjoy the newness of being engaged. Planning a wedding seems like a sucky, stressful thing for the most part and I’m not anxious to dive in. But if it means I can spend the rest of my life with my handsome, sweet best friend then I guess I’ll manage!

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Turtle Tales

June 15, 2012 at 11:29 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , )

Here’s an interesting animal story for your Friday, as seen on The Huffington Post:

You can’t say they didn’t try.

After an impressive 115 years together, two “giant turtles” at an Austrian zoo are refusing to share their cage anymore, the Austrian Times reported Friday. (The paper provided no further information about the species of turtle or tortoise in question.) 

Hope they had a pre-nup

“We get the feeling they can’t stand the sight of each other anymore,” said Helga Happ, director of the Klagenfurt-based zoo, where the turtles — Bibi, the female and Poldi, the male — have lived for the last 36 years. Before that, they called Basel Zoo in Switzerland home.

According to the paper, zoo staff realized something was amiss when Bibi bit off a chunk of her partner’s shell. When the attacks continued, Poldi was moved to another cage.

Animal experts even attempted couples’ counseling — feeding the turtles aphrodisiacs and encouraging them to play games together. But so far, efforts have failed to bring the shelled lovers back together.

Turtles aren’t the only members of the animal kingdom known to “divorce” their partners. Studies have shown that some birds who mated successfully with a partner one year have “divorced” and moved on with another partner in successive years.

At first this story made me sad because I figured love just never lasts, then I realized that I’d get sick of ANYTHING after 115 years, even cheese.  I guess this just shows that all good things do come to an end.  And sometimes that end means getting your shell chomped on by your former lover.  Or maybe the male turtle just forgot their anniversary?

If you want another weird animal story, check this out.  Unless you’re scared of the bubonic plague, that is.

Happy weekend!

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It’s a Damn Shame…

May 9, 2012 at 11:49 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , )

…that some people enforce their ideas of right or wrong onto others.  Whatever happened to the idea of live and let live?  Whether it’s regarding gay rights, reproductive rights, government and/or politics (and these things seem to be more and more intertwined nowadays), I just don’t understand how one group of people can force their beliefs on another.  Especially in the case of religion, which is unfair to the true Christians out there.  Jesus supposedly said to love thy neighbor and there was no caveat about not loving thy gay neighbor so where the hell does this hatred come from?

You may have guessed that I’m a little upset about the recent vote in North Carolina (which, by the way, affects straight people too).

I think actor/comedian Seth Rogen said it best when he stated, “Claiming that someone else’s marriage is against your religion is like being angry at someone for eating a donut because you’re on a diet.”  Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and beliefs but I also firmly believe that everyone should respect the differences in opinion that are out there.  Just because I don’t eat meat doesn’t mean I think we should pass constitutional amendments prohibiting others from doing so.  If someone doesn’t like the idea of gay marriage because they claim that the Bible speaks out against it, I suggest they take a look here.  The Bible never explicitly states that marriage is only between one man and one woman and even if it did, not everyone believes in what the Bible has to preach.  And since it’s the basis of a religion (which our founding fathers clearly wanted to keep separate from the Constitution), it should have no bearing on marriage laws today.  Besides that, the concept of marriage doesn’t solely belong to one religion or another.  It’s a human right and by denying it to the GLBT community, we’re basically saying that they’re subhuman.  As someone who is a part of this community, I find it disgustingly appalling.

Allowing two people who love each other to become stronger members of our society by giving them the same rights we’d give to a man and woman who drunkenly wed in Vegas (Britney Spears, I’m looking at you) isn’t something that’s going to destroy our society.  How could having stronger partnerships and more loving households possibly do that?  While I really do believe that I will live to see equality across the board when it comes to marriage, I simply don’t understand why it’s taking us so long to get there.  Did inter-racial marriages bring down the country?  Do the states that currently allow gays to wed still function?  Just what is the issue, then?

If you completely disagree with everything I’ve been saying, that’s your right.  I didn’t come to your house or office and make you read this post and you have the ability to just ignore me by steering clear of this blog.  Ignoring inequality isn’t something that’s so easy though and when that inequality is upheld by state and federal laws, I can’t just break those laws and get away with it.  If you don’t like gay marriage, don’t get one and please leave everyone else who’s trying to be happy to the pursuit of that happiness.  If it’s not hurting them then it shouldn’t hurt you.

Edit: Thank you Mr. President!

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All My Friends are Getting Married…

February 11, 2010 at 3:47 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

…and I couldn’t be happier that I’m not.  I can think of at least six weddings coming up in the next year that I’m supposed to attend, and those are only the ones I’ve already received invites to.  Even my little sister’s friends are getting hitched – I spent Valentine’s Day last year watching her stand as a bridesmaid for a friend of hers whom I’ve known since elementary school.  My sister actually has it worse than I do, as most of her closest gal pals are now either married or engaged.  Personally, I don’t know if I ever see myself getting married but if I do it won’t be until I can marry anyone I want, male or female.  Until then, I will be content with my non married status.  Here are five reasons why:

Reason #1:  Planning a wedding makes you crazy

This isn’t always the case but it seems to be common.  Bridezilla types really freak me out and the thought of having a panic attack over the color of invitations or the size of a cake makes me want to strangle myself with a veil.  A relative of mine spent a LOT of money on a wedding when she was my age and she and her mother both had to get prescriptions for Xanax before the big day.  Some of my friends currently in the planning stages are experiencing stresses as well.    I think that when a couple decides to get married someone else should step up to plan it, for free.  They’re getting ready to make one of the biggest decisions and changes of their lives – how can they really be expected to focus on wedding colors?

Reason #2:  Weddings are freakishly expensive

The more I hear about this, the more dismayed I am.  People really spend as much on a wedding (which is only a FEW HOURS long) as they would a down payment on a house?  How does that make sense?  No wonder drive thru weddings in Vegas are so popular.  I just can’t wrap my head around the amount of money it would take to pull something like this picture off.  I was never the kind of girl who dreamed of what her wedding day was going to be like though, so maybe that’s my problem.  Perhaps if I had childhood fantasies about the dress I would be wearing and what sort of decorative table arrangements I’d have, this would make more sense.  But I didn’t have those fantasies (and at this point I don’t really think I will) and so it just seems a tremendous waste of money and energy to me.  Isn’t a wedding supposed to be about celebrating your love and commitment with the important people in your lives?  That can be done in pajamas.

Reason #3:  In-laws are often overrated

Trust me, I know how insane families can be.  I also know how insane someone else’s family can be, which is why I’m glad I’m not tethered for life to someone else’s family’s craziness.  Don’t get me wrong, I know some in-laws are very nice people and get along fabulously with anyone they meet.  I also know that some of them are completely nuts and would like nothing better than to sabotage any relationship they see.   Either way you look at it, adding yourself to a second family means twice the holiday meltdowns and twice the birthday gifts.  No, thank you.

Reason #4:  The divorce rate

Perhaps the fact that my parents divorced when I was 21 has something to do with my jaded view on this, perhaps not.  Actually, it probably did.  Anyway, I look around and see some of my already married friends who have significant issues in their marriages.  I know that no relationship is perfect and they all take hard work but sometimes people seem to get married thinking that it will fix all of their problems.  Uh, right.  I’ve just seen divorce happen to good people and it’s never pretty.  My family member who was prescribed Xanax?  Divorced in two years.  Obviously if I were to get married I would have to be a thousand million percent sure that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with that person – I can’t even decide what I want for dinner tonight, so how could I commit to something that…well, permanent?  I’ve heard “when you know it’s right, you know” – I’ve never felt that with absolute certainty so I’ll stay on the safe, single side for now.  Which brings me to Reason Number Five…

Reason #5:  I’m enjoying the single life

And so I have no desire to put a ring on it.  I’ve been single for almost four months now and it seems to be agreeing with me.  It’s also worth noting that being single doesn’t mean I’m not dating, because I am.  It’s scary and intimidating to be back on the dating scene but it’s also kind of exciting.  I like getting to know someone new and letting them get to know the awesomeness that is me.

Before I close here, I’d like to make a little disclaimer.  If you’re married or thinking of getting married, I am in no way trying to make you reconsider.  If you’re happy then that’s all that matters.  Despite what this post may lead you to think, I do actually believe that two people can meet, fall in love and live (for the most part) happily ever after.  I’d be lying if I said I never wanted it to happen to me.  But for now, at this point in my life, I am just fine with where I’m at.

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Married Men are Funny

December 3, 2009 at 2:19 pm (Uncategorized) (, )

I’m not going to even pretend that I understand married people.  It would be like trying to understand having a penis; I’ve never experienced it so I’m not really qualified to comment.  However, in the quarter century I’ve lived on this planet, I’ve put together a few assumptions about what married life is probably like.

I imagine it’s sort of comparable to being a Simpson; lots of beer, a plethora of disappointments and a bunch of bratty kids.  However, this might only be my opinion because of my recent failed relationship…I kind of hate anyone or anything related to a coupling right now.  Anyway, there are things I guess I take for granted about married people, i.e. they don’t mind sharing the fact that they’re married.  Apparently I’m wrong about that.  Case in point: cute train guy.

Cute train guy is a guy I may have mentioned in a previous post.  He usually rides the same train I do and we’ve had some friendly conversations.  We’ve even shared a beer, as it’s legal to drink on the Metra (and how sweet it is).  Cute train guy often rides with some also cute friends who are all able to hold a semi-intelligent conversation;  it’s nice to talk to people to pass the time.  Cute train guy seems to catch more of my trains than the other two so by default we’ve talked a bit more.  One night two weeks ago he even offered to give me a ride home from the train stop and in doing so made that motion that guys make when they go to touch the small of a girls back.  That slightly registered with me as I’ve been lacking in the physical affection department for some time, but I declined his offer for a ride because I like to walk.  While I may be out of the loop on this whole dating thing, I’d like to think I’m still qualified enough to know when someone is flirting with me – and I definitely got flirty vibes from cute train guy.

So after about two weeks of sporadically chatting and passing time on the commute, we got to talking about living situations.  I asked cute train guy if he lived alone or had roommates or anything, and he said he lived alone.  I started talking about how I live alone too and I really love having an entire refrigerator all to myself (yup, I’m cool).  As I’m rambling, cute train guy is looking like he’s either thinking hard or trying not to poop.  After a moment, he sort of pauses and then oh so casually mentions that he doesn’t actually live alone, he lives with his wife.  Wife.  Mind you, this guy never wore a wedding ring so I couldn’t have known.  The whole exchange reminded me of a joke by the late, great Mitch Hedberg (“I don’t have a girlfriend but there is someone who would be really, really mad to hear me say that”).

Now, it’s not like I was planning my own walk down the aisle with this guy.  I didn’t even take him up on his offer for a ride home, but I still thought it was kinda shady that he failed to mention his little missus, especially after I asked him point blank about his living situation.  Is this common, to lie about something only to back peddle minutes later and change your story?  I guess it is if you’re a dude.

My coworker, who happens to ride the train with me every day as well, even commented on the exchange with cute train guy.  She said it was really funny that he was married because he had seemed to be talking to me an awful lot.  So I’m not actually crazy or reading too much into things, which is a bit of a relief.

Morale of the story – don’t trust anyone, ever.  Especially whitey.

And cute (married) train guy?  Started wearing his ring right after Thanksgiving.  Perhaps it was just getting cleaned or maybe he and his wife were experimenting with going ring-less.  We’re still somewhat chatty on our rides but I could swear he’s not as flirty now that I know the truth.  Was this some sort of validation he needed to feel masculine or single again?  Who knows, but I sure am glad I’m not married.

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