My Office is Great Birth Control

January 12, 2010 at 3:51 pm (Uncategorized) (, , )

I’ve had jobs before that had a similar effect as this picture, which was thankfully NOT taken anywhere around my workplace.  Having a job around children tends to make me especially glad that I have yet to procreate, and my current profession provides no exception.  I’m lucky enough to sit in my own office everyday, usually with my back to my door, and so I have minimal contact with the children we help.  Okay, to be honest I like working around them and the fact that we have a steady stream of small people in our center on a daily basis is one of my favorite things about my job.  It makes it more exciting than working for say, an accountant.  Trust me on that one (I once temped for a CPA during tax season and I never want to do it again).  However just because they’re often cute and friendly does not mean that they don’t have the ability to grate on my very last nerve, at least every now and then.  Case in point: boy who screams my name at someone other than myself.

Apparently, it’s a game to run by my coworkers office and yell my name at her.  The first day this happened, I kept looking down the hallway and trying to figure out who needed me and for what.  It appeared to be a mystery until day number two, when I actually caught the kid in the act.  I questioned him about why he was shouting my name at top volume once every 55 minutes and his response was a long stare, a short giggle and a sprint down the hallway.  It has not stopped.  I’m used to it at this point (a mere four weeks later) and so it doesn’t really phase me.  It does, however, make me glad that I can tell this young man goodbye at the end of the day and not have to worry about hearing his shouts for at least another 18 to 20 hours.

Yesterday I witnessed an eight year old boy have a temper tantrum/terrific meltdown in the lobby.  He was adamant that he was NOT going to learn today and we couldn’t make him.  Little did he know I’m a black belt in the art of whooping ass and I swiftly pinned his arms behind his head and convinced him to head to class.  At least, that’s what I wanted to do.  In reality I stood by biting my tongue as his parents bribed him with everything under the sun to get him to go to work (seriously – his choice of new gaming system?  Like this type of bribery isn’t going to backfire down the road…).  This little kid was throwing pillows, slamming doors and telling us to shut up.  As glad as I was that he was not my child, part of me wished he was so I could show him a thing or two about manners.  I know this makes me sound like the crotchety old woman who uses her cane to poke kids off her lawn, but sometimes that old woman is who I relate with the best.

I’ve seen many other temper tantrums and fights in my short time at this office.  I actually got to referee one such instance over the summer, as a teenage boy decided he hated his parents and wanted to conference call them in my office to let them know.  Of course, he pulled my boss in for this and of course it took up my entire morning as well as my phone line.  Days like that are what makes it worth getting out of bed in the morning.

At the end of almost any given day, I really do enjoy working with children.  I always have and chances are I always will.  And one of my very favorite things about working with kids is the fact that I can send them to their respective homes at the end of the day while I go to my apartment and make myself cookies and beer for dinner.  I love being a childless grown-up!


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