Grin and Bear It

July 21, 2014 at 7:33 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

I hate going to the dentist.


I went last week after waiting a year (thanks, lack of dental insurance after my lay-off) and while it wasn’t as bad as I was expecting it to be, it sure was close.  I think the dental hygienist I see is some sort of sadist because she scrapes my teeth like it’s going out of style.  I was also treated to her nonstop babbling, from everything about how she doesn’t really like Game of Thrones (excuse me what?) to the fact that she’s never gotten a mammogram.  I don’t know how we got there either, trust me.  She’s a nice enough person but I want to punch her in the face so all of her teeth fall out and she’s the one who has to sit in a chair and endure painful dental work.  The fact that the whole time she was talking she had her fingers stuck halfway down my throat probably added to my annoyance, as all I could muster were small smiles and spit during the entire one-sided conversation.  Although I guess it’s a good thing I couldn’t speak because by that point, Lord only knows what would’ve come out of my mouth.

The actual dentist (who I saw for a whopping 2 minutes during my hour long visit) wasn’t much better.  Sure, she’s friendly and competent but she told me some story about a birthday party she was going to for her uncle’s new wife.  I guess the woman is turning 50 but is insisting on having a Princess themed party…another excuse me what?  I don’t know if they teach these people to make inane small talk while treating patients or what but I had to stop from rolling my eyes.

Good news is I have a clean bill of dental health and I don’t have to subject myself to that torture for another six months.  I would’ve had a huge smile on my face as I left the office but to be honest, my jaw was sore from holding it open for so long!


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