July 13, 2011 at 9:16 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

Apparently, I’ve been on a clumsy streak this week.  I broke my scale on Monday and walked into a door last night.

So I have to weigh my special needs diabetic cat frequently to make sure her blood sugar isn’t all out of whack.  This involves me standing on the scale with her in my arms, noting that weight, tossing her to the floor, weighting myself, nothing that weight and then doing a little subtraction.  It’s not the most foolproof thing but it works (although I don’t exactly enjoy weighting myself so damn much).  Well, that is it works when the scale is working.  On Monday I picked it up to do my thing and promptly dropped it, narrowly avoiding a serious toe amputation.  It is was a digital scale and when I stepped on it, it said HELLO and then ERROR.  Then it turned off.  This went on for a few minutes before I gave up and began occupying myself in other areas of the apartment.

Then I turned around and saw this:

Smart ass.

This is now her favorite sitting spot.

I tried to buy a new scale yesterday at CVS but the one and only unit they had in the store would’ve cost me my first-born child and since I’ve got big plans on turning said firstborn into a full-time housekeeper, I decided against such an extravagant purchase.  Instead, I came home and started laundry, which is how I walked into the door.

I had just finished two loads and was on my way out of the dark and scary basement when the injury occurred.  Like a genius, I turned off the light prior to opening the door and somehow, in my spectacularly uncoordinated fashion, managed to kick the heavy basement door right back into my face.  Over my right eye, to be exact.  I wound up just standing there in dark and cursing until the pain and tears subsided enough for me to make my way down the alley and up the three flights of stairs to the comfort of my living room, where I iced my wound while praying for no black eye.  Luckily it didn’t swell too much and my bangs manage to cover the worst of the damage but I still know what I did.

And so does my cat.


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